By Paul Pearson
Anna’s Annihilator’s vs. BUD GUZZLER.
While the Denver Broncos were manhandling the Kansas City Chiefs, Denver linebacker Mario Haggan was making a major impact on fantasy football. His 34 points led the way for the Annihilators, who took sole possession of first place with a 173-166 win over the Guzzlers. Steven Jackson helped the winning cause with 28 points. The Annihilators were thus able to overcome a 0 from Darnell Dockett and leaving Miami safety Yeremiah Bell and his 26 points on the bench. The top Guzzler starter was Andre Johnson, who scored 32 points. Dez Bryant scored 22 points in an impressive Dallas Cowboys victory, but he took a roster spot that could have gone to Fred Jackson, the proud scorer of 39 points.
phily’s phlunky’s vs. The Easy Riders.
It’s safe to say Tom Brady didn’t let the Cleveland Browns beat him twice. He scored a team-high 35 points on Sunday night to help the Phlunkys beat the Riders by a score of 211-167. San Francisco linebacker Patrick Willis contributed 29 points to the Phlunkys effort, and Mario Manningham added 25. The Riders did get 27 points from Knowshon Moreno and 22 from Mark Sanchez in an overtime win over the Browns. However, they also got only 2 points from Kansas City defensive tackle Wallace Gilberry. The news was even worse from Hines Ward, who suffered a concussion early in his game with the New England Patriots and wound up scoring 0 points. (He made a catch before his injury, but that was ruled an incompletion on replay.)
ATLANTA IRONMAN vs. Shake N Bake.
As a famous catcher (not receiver) once said, it’s not over until it’s over. The Bakes staged a 53-point comeback Monday night and prevailed over the Ironman by a margin of 192-153. The comeback was led by Washington linebacker London Fletcher, who scored 22 points, and DeSean Jackson, who scored 20. The top Bake scorer was Felix Jones with 25 points. Kansas City linebacker Derrick Johnson led the Ironman charge with 28 points. He got help from Tampa Bay’s Jermaine Gresham, who scored 24 points. But Michael Turner came up small for both the Atlanta Falcons and the Ironman, scoring only 3 points on Thursday night.
DOOMSDAY DEFENSE vs. Barbara’s Barbarians.
In this matchup, it all came down to Monday night. The Defense got no points at all from Ryan Torain, while the Barbarians got 28 points from three players, including 19 from Jeremy Maclin, and walked away with a 145-134 victory. Eli Manning scored a team-high 24 points for the Barbarians, and Arizona safety Adrian Wilson contributed 20 points. Matt Ryan led the Defense with 25 points in a come-from-behind Thursday night win. However, Buffalo defensive tackle Spencer Johnson scored just1 point in the Bills’ first win of the 2010 season.
Team Bud Light vs. Weezies Weezles.
Dwayne Bowe mounted a beyond-valiant effort for the Weezles, but his 49 points were not enough to save the Weezles from falling to the Lights by a score of 226-204. Roddy White scored 40 points on Thursday night and gave the Lights a lead they never relinquished. Calvin Johnson scored 31 for the Lights in nearly leading the Detroit Lions to a come-from-behind win, and Maurice Jones-Drew put up 29. The critical error -- if this could be called en error -- for the Weezles was to give the starting nod to Peyton Manning (who scored a very underwhelming 7 points in a Colts win) instead of Matt Cassel (who scored 33 in a Chiefs beating at the hands of the Denver Broncos).
#1 MemesBoyz vs. TEAM HEAVY.
With Aaron Rodgers on a bye week, the Heavys didn’t have a quarterback to start. As it turns out, they didn’t need one. Santana Moss supplied 7 Monday night points that put the Heavys over the top in a 144-143 win over the Boyz. Anthony Fasano led the way for the Heavys with 24 points, followed by Arizona cornerback Greg Toler with 20. David Garrard was the top Boyz scorer with 31 points, but no one else in the starting lineup even reached the 20-point threshold. Tampa Bay linebacker Geno Hayes scored only 2 points, and he took a roster spot that could have gone to Pittsburgh’s James Harrison, whose 15 points were wasted on the bench.
Steel lions vs. I am NFmeL.
Put simply, Michael Vick was the MAN. His 55 points made the Lions an easy winner over the NFmeLs in a 249-183 romping. Of course, it also helped the Lions to get big scores from its receiving corps. Mike Wallace got 36 points on Sunday night, while Mike Williams of the Seattle Seahawks scored 28. Kyle Orton, whose Denver Broncos made mincemeat of the Kansas City Chiefs, had an impressive outing of his own, scoring a team-high 28 points for the NFmeLs. Seattle defensive end Chris Clemons was the NFmeLs’ top defensive scorer with 26 points.
PLAYOFF CHANCES
They’re in: Anna’s Annihilator’s (8-2), Weezies Weezles (7-3)
They’re looking good: Team Bud Light (6-4), I am NFmeL (6-4), Steel lions (6-4), Barbara’s Barbarians (6-4)
They need help: TEAM HEAVY (5-5), Shake N Bake (5-5), BUD GUZZLER (4-6), #1 MemesBoyz (4-6), phily’s phlunky’s (4-6)
They’re done: The Easy Riders (3-7), ATLANTA IRONMAN (3-7), DOOMSDAY DEFENSE (3-7)
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