The Big House: Race to the Playoffs

by Sam Spiegelman

Pit Bulls Rips Lights Out a New One, Continue Push for Playoffs

As Ron Mexico’s Pit Bulls does its best to surpass Ben Riback for the second seed in the Blue Division, the top seed in the Maize Division stood in their way. A 14-point victory, however, granted Ron Mexico a tie for second place, essentially forcing a do-or-die game come Week 13. 

It was not necessarily the prolific offensive displays we expected out of Ron Mexico and Lights Out; instead, it was a defensive showdown. The Buffalo Bills held Big Ben scoreless; the presence of Rusty Smith for the Titans allowed Houston to hold Chris Johnson to a measly seven total yards and Dez Bryant and Roddy White were finally slowed down, combining for just four points, none coming from Bryant. 

As Lights Out struggled to put points on the board, Ron Mexico got a so-so effort out of Joe Wacko for Flacco, and enough production out of the wide receiving core to make up for the lackluster running back scoring. Frank Gore is now done for the season, and Danny Woodhead – we love him, but Woody is still lacking fantasy relevance.  

Top Seed Pain Curve Slows Down THE SHOCKER 
THE SHOCKER, who must like the NFC West will end up making the playoffs with a record barely over .500, was stifled by the league’s best team, getting shellacked by 30 points in a potential Super Bowl Preview.

Led by Michael Vick and Wes Welker, who each scored in the 20s in Week 12, Pain Curve was able to dominate. Vick was able to continue putting up stellar stats despite the Eagles losing in Chicago, and Welker found his early-season form against Lions, scoring twice and nearly reaching the 100-yard receiving mark. 
Every other player in the starting roster played up to their expectations – Maurice Jones-Drew continued his stretch of 100-yard games versus the wounded G-Men, Matt “I’m a Man, I’m” Forte totaled nearly 140 yards and the Jets defense made Carson Palmer look straight up silly.  
For THE SHOCKER, utter stupidity and bad luck plagued the team. Jeff Reed – yeah, he is no longer on a team. Check the news bro. Aside from t hat, V-Jax got injured two plays into his season, meaning he’s basically useless for future starter considerations. Stump the Schaub rebounded, sort of, which is a positive sign going forward. Although Adrian Peterson was injured early in his game, he was still able to contribute 21 points, and Arian Foster continues his breakout season.

Ron Mexico’s Pit Bulls vs. THE SHOCKER: A Battle for Deuces

So you want to be a playoff team? This is each team’s opportunity to prove they are worthy for the second seed in their conference.  
Both teams are 7-5, and believe it or not, they are surprisingly even teams. What Ron Mexico’s Pit Bulls lacks in the running game is matched by what The Shocker is missing in the wide receiver core. Both teams start middle-of-the-pack quarterbacks who are capable of a breakout performance every now and then. One subtle advantage – the tight end spot. The not-so-well-known Jacob Tamme is a much superior option than second-stringer Rob Gronkowski, although Tom Brady can hit his WR5 for two scores on any given Sunday.

Joe “Wacko for” Flacco will face the Pittsburgh secondary, which if not for Speedy Stevey Johnson’s inconsistent hands would have been embarrassed by Ryan Fitzpatrick. Danny Woodhead, or Woody if you will, gets to face his original team for the first time, and no one found a better use for him than The Hoodie. With Frank Gore out of action, it is absolutely essential to nab either Brian Westbrook or Anthony Dixon; I’m simply not trusting B-Jax this week. In the wide receiver unit, Jeremy Maclin, Marques Colston and Mike Williams all match up against weak secondaries and should be able to compile the yardage and find the end-zone early and often for Ron Mexico.

The Shocker, who is favored by CBS Sports this week, features Schaub facing off against the elite Philly pass defense. Schaub has the ability to pick apart most defenses but has not demonstrated that quality too often this season. Wide receivers are still a question mark – Larry Fitzgerald is basically living off his name until he find someone to throw him the ball, and Derrick Mason is a riley vet who always has a chance to make his mark on a big game. Without V-Jax, it is between Lee Evans, Davonne Bess, The Marshall Plan and Devin Hester for starting considerations. I think we all know the one go-to guy in that race.

Prediction: Ron Mexico’s Pit Bulls has too much on the line this week to falter. Strong wide receiver matchups and capable running backs will get their points, but the purple birds need Flacco if they are to win at home against the rival Steelers; he’s in for an all-or-nothing game.

Old School vs. Ben Riback: Avoiding the Slip-and-Fall

 Ron Mexico’s Pit Bulls are tailgating the hell out of Ben Riback right now as both vie for the second seed in the Blue Division. While RM faces off against the second seed in the Maize Division, Ben Riback must contend against a dangerous 5-7 team in Old School in what can only be viewed as a trap game.

A strong outing by Aaron Rodgers will once again make the difference in the matchup. Rodgers gets to feast on the San Fran secondary, something only Derek Anderson could struggle with. His other studs – Rashard Mendenhall and Andre “The Giant” Johnson – face difficult defenses. The Ravens defense that Mendenhall will face in primetime Sunday night has showed it’s vulnerable to a good rushing attack, but given the stage and implications of the game, Ray Lewis will likely lead an emotional defense playing in their home stadium. And the Philly secondary that The Giant will have to contend with is among the best in the league. Since Andre is a stud, I am sure he will find the end-zone. There is, however, a good chance that the Eagles will limit him in this crucial contest.

On the other side, Old School will start an all-or-nothing crowd of players Sunday that could either explode for a victory or fail to even show up on the scoreboard. Starting at quarterback, Mark Sanchez will have to lead the Jets in Foxborough if the team wants to score points. Gang Green gashed the Pats in Week 2 on the ground, so I am sure the Hoodie will not allow it for a second straight turn. So as the Jets offense goes, so does Sanchize and his new big-play wideout Santonio Holmes and red-zone specialist Dustin “The Wind” Keller. LeSean McCoy will get to face off against a Houston defense that stifled Chris Johnson. The Texans, however, were dealing with Rusty Smith last week; now they have their hands full with one Michael Vick, and as all of their attention is focused on stopping him, McCoy could easily feast on the matchup.